Margaret was born on 23rd March 1942 to Arthur and Phyllis Lavis, in Cheltenham. Her mother had temporarily left their home in Bristol after it was damaged in The Blitz, but Arthur continued to work as a firefighter in the city. They were soon all back in Brislington where Margaret Lavis went to Broomhill Primary School, and then St Anne's Park Secondary Modern Girls School.
Without any siblings she was very close to her cousin Jill who she looked upon as her sister. They had many adventures together, swapping clothes and even going scrumping together with “Uncle Arthur”, as Margaret’s father was known to everyone; he was constantly making family and friends laugh with a funny story or a practical joke.
Phyllis was a talented seamstress who could make anything, and Margaret retained a love of sewing throughout her life – her granddaughter Darcey and Annie treasure their hand sewn quilts made for them by “Nanny/Mum”.
Margaret developed a lifelong love of singing as a child and along with her good friend Mary Brewer she was part of the St Mary Redcliffe choir – one of the other choir boys was a certain Fred Wedlock who achieved chart success with “the Oldest Swinger in Town”.
Upon leaving St Anne's Park Secondary Modern Girls School, Margaret came second out of the whole class in her overall assessment, being rated as very good in English & Religious Instruction. She was noted as accomplished in swimming and lifesaving, something else that she enjoyed throughout her life. Miss Lucas Headmistress commented that Margaret was “a thoughtful, dependable worker, with good all-round ability. Thoroughly trustworthy and well mannered.”
After school Margaret became a shorthand typist in Bristol and in 1963 aged 21, she went to a dance at The Glen Dance Hall in Clifton. There she met Ken Tinner, a 23-year-old Electronic Fitter in the Royal Air Force who was just back from a three-year tour of duty in RAF Akrotiri and a year later they married in St Luke’s Church, Brislington, Bristol.
Following their wedding Ken’s postings took them to Scampton near Lincoln and then the village of Homberg Oberhesson in Germany. In their very basic flat Margaret would often host the Padre’s services and visiting senior officers, although the lack of occasional tables left one AOC soaked in tea as he balanced the cakes and cup. In 1965 Karen was born at nearby Giessen University Hospital and shortly after they moved to RAF Jever where Andrew was born. In Jever they lived next door to Ella and Burt who became lifelong friends.
After a few years in the UK at RAF Wantage and Innsworth the RAF postings took Margaret to sunnier climes. The children started primary school and nursery in Malta and the family lived in a flat in Balsan enjoying wonderful weather, swimming in the sea and roof top barbecues. Unfortunately, after 6 months the Maltese President Minto decided to reduce the UK forces presence there and Margaret and Ken relocated to Cyprus. Here the idyllic Mediterranean life of daily swims and camping on the beach in Aiya Napa continued for a couple of years until it ended abruptly in 1974 when Turkish troops invaded in the North. With Ken stranded at the RAF Akrotiri (Salt Lake) base Margaret and the children had to run from the beach and barricade themselves in their house in Limassol for many days awaiting evacuation. The Cypriot neighbours fled to the Troudos Mountains, but Margaret still had the presence of mind to nip round to take the roast chicken out of Androula and George’s house before it started a fire. Margaret and the children made it to the RAF base led down in flatbed trucks to avoid stray bullets whilst a Scottish soldier led the way playing the bagpipes to show they were British and not part of the war.
When they returned the RAF clearly felt that having been thrown out of two countries International Relations were best served by the Tinner’s staying in England, first at RAF Benson and then onto RAF Brize Norton. The previous 10 years of Forces life, moving around and dealing with the unexpected had honed those attributes that Margaret’s school report had highlighted when she was 16 – intelligent, organised, dependable and always there for others. In Carterton Margaret became central to organising the community events and getting things done. In 1977 she arranged the street party with bunting draped across the RAF quarters and when the rain came it became even more of a sight to behold as the colours ran leaving the RAF houses with red, white and blue striped roofs. The RAF top brass were not impressed but could hardly admonish Margaret for such a patriotic display.
Margaret and Ken bought their first home in Humphries Close; Carterton and she recalled the 11 years there as being a very happy time. The children grew and the community regularly gathered to make Gala floats and have street parties – with Margaret always at the heart of things. This included head banging to Status Quo at 2am which was a particular embarrassment to the children.
In 1980 Margaret put her administrative talents to professional use again by joining the Town Council and within a few years she was promoted to Deputy Town Clerk. She held that post for 22 years until retiring in 2006, during which time the Town Council grew from a bungalow to a purpose-built Town Hall, and Carterton grew extensively with new estates and roads. Upon her retirement the former Mayor Brian Crossland paid tribute to Margaret’s contribution to the work of the council and the life of the community in Carterton saying, “Margaret has always been a wonderfully energetic person, who has been deeply involved in all of the council’s activities, turning her hand to everything from organising swimming galas, the Millennium concert, St Georges day events and keeping our books of account in order.” Margaret was also a leader of the Carterton Health Walks and devised the routes.
Travel has always been a passion for Margaret and when Ken was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s in 2005, she channelled her energy into organising trips for them to the places around the world they’d always wanted to visit. On a trip Down Under they contacted Carterton, New Zealand to arrange a visit. The District Council gave them a reception and then the maintenance manager showed them round town, giving particular attention to his pride and joy, the new sewage works, followed by the electricity sub-station and the cemetery. Margaret retired early to focus on spending time with Ken and their trips also included flying over Niagara Falls and visiting Australia.
Margaret’s passion for singing has led to her joining choirs and amateur dramatics groups wherever she has been, and she found great joy in performing at the Albert Hall in Handel’s Messiah with WOAPA West Oxfordshire Academy of Performing Acts Adult Singing group. She also enjoyed gardening, theatre and walking.
It is Margaret’s devotion to others, especially her family that we will remember best, always putting them first. In the the early days she took the family home from one posting to another at the whim of the RAF, often when Ken was deployed away. As the children grew, she made them a loving home at the heart of the community and the door was always open to their friends. When Annie and Peter became the partners of Andrew and Karen they were warmly welcomed, and then Matthew and Darcey came to know and love “Nanny”. And Margaret’s love and commitment to Ken ensured that he stayed at home with her and received the best possible care.
In December 2012 Witney Lakes hosted one of the first national Dementia Conferences attended by David Cameron and she presented her personal journey as a Dementia carer and practical enhancements she had introduced to aid Ken’s care. These simplicist enhancements of introducing coloured cutlery, plates, wall clocks are now the mainstay for dementia patients across the UK.
Margaret lived her life focussed on others doing whatever she could to help them and enrich their community, wherever she was. Bob Woodward her cousin and found of the CLIC charity recruited his favourite cousin Margaret into helping him launch the Oxford CLIC branch. She spent many years working alongside Bob as voluntary treasurer for this CLIC charity branch.
Life threw challenges at her, and she always faced them head on and with determination, even in her final years when she became less well. Whether at the front and organising things, or quietly behind the scenes, Margaret was central to so much and she will be greatly missed by family and friends.